The Importance of Healing from Trauma

38  3 min

All of us have experienced trauma. Yet, while some of us acknowledge the traumas that we have experiences, others do not. The latter remain unaware of the pain that plagues their lives, never realizing that their unconscious traumas dictate their conscious behaviour.

There are five common types of trauma:

1. Rejection Trauma: this trauma leads us to feel unwanted. Under its influence, we often experience imposter syndrome and fear being outcasted.
2. Abandonment Trauma: unconsciously propelled by this type of trauma, we never get too attached, preferring to jump from one relationship into the other. Leaving first, we find, is the only way to avoid abandonment.
3. Trauma of Masochism: this leads us to destroy ourselves. If we suffer from this type of trauma, we usually struggle to set boundaries and protect ourselves.
4. Betrayal Trauma: this type of trauma causes us to dread lies and cheating. We are often unable to trust others.
5. Trauma of Perfectionism: controlled by the evil grip of this trauma, we are stuck with self-limiting beliefs, thinking we are never good enough. We hardly ever appreciate our achievements, noting there is always something we could have done better.

What are the Roots of Trauma?

The causes of trauma, as it turns out, are different for all of us. What traumatizes some amuses others. What is simply difficult for one can be purely traumatic for another. Still, there are a few common roots of trauma that seem to incite the same response in every one of us:

• Physical and Emotional Violence
• Physical and Emotional Harassment
• Losing a loved one
• Stress
• Neglect
• Breakups
• Disillusionment: or, in other words, being unable to achieve what we hoped we would

Regardless of the root of your trauma, you should heal your emotional wounds. If you fail to do so, you may suffer from the following consequences:

1. Anxiety: Though we all become anxious from time to time, living in a constant state of anxiety is not normal. This form of neuroticism can ruin your life.
2. Repeating Old Patterns: Even if you’ve forgotten about the trauma that wounded you, it may still be encoded in your unconscious mind. In this case, it keeps shaping your conscious behaviours without you realizing it. Unhealed traumas remain at work for years. It is no wonder many of my patients note they feel as if they just keep going in circles. They seem stuck in the same type of relationships, even if they’re dating new people, just as they keep experiencing the same events at work—even after they’ve changed their jobs.
3. Behavioural Changes: In their attempt to cope with the past, many people develop addictions. Addictions, of course, vary. Still, from alcohol, through drugs, to cigarettes, no addiction is ever good.
4. Health Issues: Stress and anxiety can have detrimental effects on the physical body. This may result in the development of autoimmune diseases, as well as diseases of the cardiovascular system.
5. Cognitive Impairment: Plagued by trauma, the brain struggles to focus on anything but that trauma. Trauma impairs concentration and memory. If you still suffer from unhealed trauma, chances are—your brain isn’t functioning optimally, and neither are you.

If you want to avoid these difficulties, heal your traumas now! I crafted a special course, “Healing the Five Traumas,” to help you do so.

Love,
Natalia Kobylkina
Psychologist, family therapist, author
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