The ability to communicate effectively is extremely important both professionally and personally. Good communication helps us to express ourselves, to stand up for our boundaries and principles, and to influence others. It allows us to receive and achieve the things we want. Poor communication skills can cost us:
- Unsuccessful first meetings – men/women run away from us or we are not interesting to them.
- Lack of career progress – we fail job interviews or do not know how to ask for a promotion.
- Relationship or marriage problems – we do not know how to deal with conflicts, discuss situations or ask for help from a partner.
Low sales in business – you can not sell the service or your product successfully. You don’t want to pay such a high price, do you? It is much better if we just learn how to impress the opposite sex, how to influence others, how to negotiate and sell.
Here are my 5 key elements for successful communication:
- Appreciate yourself. Often, insecurity in communication begins with inner insecurity in ourselves. We do not value ourselves, we feel vulnerable and insecure, we have low self-esteem. If we do not respect ourselves, how do we expect this from others? Therefore, you must master the inner state of “I am precious.” This is the point at which you accept and trust yourself, realize your place in this world, and begin to draw faith and strength from within.
- Control your voice. Whether you communicate еffectively or not depends largely on the intonation of your voice, tone, strength, and good articulation. For example, muttering under the nose is a sign of low self-esteem. If you speak low at the beginning, practice pronouncing the words clearly and upwards (this is done by holding the chin upright). You won’t have to strain your voice, but you’ll sound an idea louder.
- Look into the eyes. When you avoid eye contact with your interlocutor, it subconsciously makes him think that you are either lying to him or you have low self-esteem. So even if you really feel anxious, try to rarely look away. When you hold someone’s gaze, it can make you look strong and confident, even if you are not, during deals and negotiations. During romantic meetings, this act makes you magnetic and desirable.
- Technique – mirror body language. According to research, 90% of our communication is non-verbal, i.e. is done through body language. The Mirror Reflection technique can help a lot. It consists of imitating the posture and gestures of our interlocutor – for example, he leans forward and we lean forward or the other person puts his hand on his hip, after a while, we do the same. In this way, you create harmony and greater closeness between the two of you through gestures and body postures.
- Listen. The best communicators are almost always the best listeners. That’s why it’s important to develop your listening skills. The trick is to listen to your interlocutor without giving an assessment or without being distracted, thinking about what to say next. The idea is to truly respond to what the other person has told you, not just to react.
Each of these 5 elements is difficult to master and requires you to take the time and do the practice.
If you want to learn:
- more such techniques for body language?
- how to read the body language of the interlocutor?
- how to master the inner state “I am valuable”?
- how to influence your voice?
- how to be good listeners?
Welcome to my webinar “Successful communication with the opposite sex“, where we will talk not only about personal communication but also communication at work (among colleagues, with the boss, with clients). Extremely useful if you struggle with dating and meetings if you work in sales or customer service.
Psychologist, family therapist, author
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