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You have a crush on someone—a colleague or a friend of a friend. You may even have a crush on someone you found on social media or met at a bar! You’re drawn to them. You want to know if you’d be a good fit for each other. Yet, you have no idea how to speak with them without appearing stupid, annoying, audacious, or desperate.
First, I’d like to say that meeting new people—and initiating a conversation—comes with a certain dose of risk. You cannot accurately predict the reaction of the other person. You cannot be 100% certain you won’t make a fool of yourself.
In spite of that, you should gather the courage to try. Don’t let shame or worry hold you back! They’ve never killed anyone, have they?
Luckily for us, there are a few good techniques you can use to strike up a conversation. They’re effective 90% of the time! Let me share a few of them:
For men – How do start a conversation with a woman?
- Give her a compliment – women love getting compliments! They’d hardly have a negative reaction to your compliment. Plus, you don’t even need to know a woman to tell her she’s beautiful. And, trust me, compliments always lead to a conversation.
- Request some information – When you first meet someone you can simply pose a random question. “Where are the restrooms?” you may ask. “Who’s performing tonight?” and “Is the food here any good?” will also do.
- Just say “Hello!” – At the end of the day, you don’t have to have a reason to speak with a woman. Just walk up to her and say “hi!” This doesn’t mean she’ll reject you! In fact, many women like it when men are direct and upfront with their intentions.
- Use information from her online profiles – If you met your crush online, feel free to use the information she’s provided in her profile. Notice what she likes, what she shares, and what pages she follows. You could even check her activity and ask her about a comment she’s posted. If she has a particular series she likes, and she’s written a comment about it, ask her what she thinks about a particular character or episode. If she’s shared a funny video with a dog, tell her the pet reminds you of your aunt/uncle/brother/friend.
For women – How to start a conversation with a man?
- Request a favor – Men love to feel like heroes. Hence, that’s the perfect way to meet a man. If you are in line at a supermarket, feel free to turn to a man and ask him to “guard” your cart as you run to grab more cheese.
- Comment on the text on his T-Shirt or on his tattoo– This technique is perfect if you’re at a party. You could also use it to comment on one of his posts on social media. You can ask him: “What does your tattoo mean?” You could also make a joke about the text on his T-Shirt.
- Take advantage of the situation you’re in. – Look around. What could help you strike up a conversation? Trust me, there’s always something o talk about. If you’re on a plane, for instance, you can complain about the delay or the uncomfortable seats. If you’re on a train, you could softly comment on the heat.
- Run into him (accidentally) and apologize – As cliched as this may be, this works like a charm! Bump into someone. Then, turn around and apologize. Make sure to gaze into his eyes.
If you want to:
- learn more dating tips,
- establish a happy relationship
- keep the passion in your relationship
- seduce and become desired by men/women,
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Psychologist, family therapist, author
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